246. Unveiling the Struggles of Homelessness: A Conversation with Sir Kaya Redford

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This is happiness solved with America's happiness. Coach Sandee Sgarlata.

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Hello, everyone, and thank you for joining me today. I'm so happy you're here. I'm Sandee Sgarlata. I was born in Virginia Beach and raised in the Baltimore Annapolis area and had very humble and tragic beginnings. And as a result, my life was a hot mess.

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Thankfully, 33 years ago, I got my act together and since that time I have dedicated my life to serving others and raising awareness that no matter what you've been through, you can choose happiness and live the life of your dreams. Happiness Solved is dedicated to giving you content that is empowering, motivational, inspirational and of course, a dose of happiness. It's my way to give back to the world and share other people's stories. This thing called life can be challenging and my guests share their amazing stories, wisdom and life lessons that demonstrate anyone can choose happiness. You see, happiness is a choice and the choice is yours.

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Today's episode is amazing and I am so grateful for you. Thank you for listening and don't forget to leave a review and follow me on social media at Coach. Sandee Sgarlata. Enjoy the show, sir. Kaya Redford, so great to see you again, my friend.

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What's up, Sandy? You're incredible. I'm just so excited to be on your show. You're beaming today. You've got the biggest smile in the universe and wow, big topic today too.

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Yes, we've got a lot to talk about. Oh, my God. Not that I even know what we're going to talk about, but I know it's thing about happiness, I don't know. What we're going to talk about either. I never know what I'm going to talk about with my guests.

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We just start talking. And the first thing because I know I said this to you before I started recording, so just for the audience, Kaya and I met at Rainmaker and Ultimate Wealth Camp icon speaker program in Chicago. Bill Walsh's, Power Team International. And we sat next to each other for a few days. I didn't know you were a to.

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I want to talk about that. You've got so many great things. But what I was wondering, because I'm looking at your bio and I see this picture of you with Ashton Kucher and that you're an award winning director and producer of your documentary called Homeless in America. And then I was like, I meant to ask you this. Are you related to Robert Redford?

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It's funny, the answer to that is by six degrees of separation. We're all related, right? And I think we might even be getting into some spirituality today as well. And A Course in Miracles, something that I'm a miracle minded coach trained in a Course of Miracles and trained by the Marianne Williamson. And we're all one.

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Come on now. We're all one. We are. And I would say that he's an incredible robert Rev is an incredible man. Has an icon in the film industry certainly has inspired me and so many other people.

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And yeah, based on that, you bringing that up. The documentary Homeless in America in 2004 and actually won best social documentary at the International New York Film Festival. And it was just a passion project of seeing people that, know, struggling, living on the streets and picking up a camera. And I did it with a very amazing, incredible and eccentric man called Tommy Wazo. You definitely want to look him up if you've ever seen the movie.

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I think The Disaster Artist, I think it's called, that they made a movie about him. He's a director producer, and he made a movie called The Room. They made a movie about him that won a Golden Globe award. The Room. He made the room.

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And so what happened is it was like an independent movie, right? I think he spent I don't know how much money on it, but it's high level production. But know, one would say he was doing the best he could and he was so passionate about it. And he got a billboard on Brea in Hollywood, and for ten plus 14 years he would promote the movie. And everybody was just laughing at it, thought it was a joke.

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It's like this the worst movie it was on Rotten Tomatoes, the worst movie ever made, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But he persevered and kept playing the movie and marketing it. And then out of the blue, this sort of cult like following, these people started to show up and they would watch the movie, and they would make noises and go crazy while watching the movie. So eventually what happened is he got a following and people would come watch the movie and start throwing footballs in the movie theater. Like stuff that you never would ever see happen in a movie theater started happening.

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And so he grassroots, he grew it. And then at some point, that Hollywood, who thought it was just a joke, this movie, this terrible acting, this terrible this, this terrible that started to pay attention to it because this guy's now making money. He's got an actual following. He's made this movie a and so they made a movie about him making the movie. And it's a great story.

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It's about perseverance. Yeah. And the world's never going to make anybody happy. People are going to laugh at you. When you have a vision and a goal, and you've got to believe in yourself.

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And even if in other people's eyes, what you have is a piece of crap or a piece of shit in your eyes, if it's gold, if you can find people who resonate with that and relate to it, he found an audience for it. And now I think from I spoke to him about a year ago, he's flooded with scripts. There's people that because that movie got won a Golden Globe, create a lot of traction. And so now other people want to work with him. So there is a place in this world for everybody and everybody's gift and everybody's art, even when the world wants to tell you no.

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The answer is you get to believe in yourself and you get to know that you have that. I love it. I love that. And that what a great story, and thank you for sharing that because I love sharing stories like that on my podcast because that's what it's, you know, we learn from.

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We met, we became friends, we filmed homeless in America. This was after he had done The Room. And he's just an eccentric chap, as they say, and I wish him the best, and I'm sure maybe, who knows, we'll do something, maybe homeless in America. Number two, I've always been an advocate for people that are suffering, and I think that's what really drew me to that project and the learnings that I got from that is that what we think of as a homeless person is we really don't have a clue. We think that there are people that I'm not saying everybody, but some people have super connected and want to make a difference and reach out.

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And so thank you so much to the people that are donating and giving and come across a homeless person on the street and give them some food or help them out. That's what this is about. But in general, there is a stigma about the homeless and what people don't realize and what came out in the documentary is there's many reasons, many reasons why a person sometimes finds themselves homeless. And the idea behind that is that and it's even said in a documentary by a homeless person, and it was actually true that the average American I heard somewhere that the average American doesn't even have $10,000 in savings. Like if they had an emergency surgery or emergency situation, they had to come up with ten grand.

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It would be a massive challenge. So the idea that the average American, if that person lost their job or lost their opportunity, the average person is one or two paychecks away from being homeless themselves. Now, that is correct. Do they recognize that? Does a person know that?

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Does a person even think that way? The average person think that I'm one or two paychecks away from being homeless. That's not a normal way of thinking. No. And it certainly doesn't happen to the majority of people.

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They find a way to pull through and make the money and land the job or get a new job or I know with COVID and certain things happen, the government support, but in reality, we get to have a lot more compassion because we're all one, we're all the same. And a lot of people that are homeless are there because of mental disorders or diseases or something like to that effect. And unfortunately, we've discovered that a lot of the homeless are veterans. Yes, the population that is homeless is huge. And so they come back from the war having given their everything.

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Everything. Yeah. And I don't want to get into my philosophy because I'm very anti war. Me, personally, I think there's a lot of healing that gets to happen in this world. So I'm not a proponent on war, so I'm not exactly excited about the sacrifice so called.

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I'm just being transparent. I'm speaking my own truth, my own honesty. I'm not that excited about fighting for our freedom, blah, blah, blah. I don't buy into that completely. I'm certainly in belief that in certain situations, you have no choice but to protect your country.

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But I think there is definitely an agenda of greed, power, money, and control that is really the secondary agenda by most wars do with freedom. It's more about resources, money, and power and control. And it sickens me, but let's just say these men and these women go and put their lives on the line for whatever they believe is the call of nobility and of service. And they come back with PTSD, and they come back so screwed up. They come back addicted to all these medications, which, by the way, have all these side effects.

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I won't mention his name, but we'll call him John. He came back, he went to two wars. He came back severe PTSD on 14 pills a day. He lost his basically, his wife started cheating on him because he was living in bed every single day and not able to function. He had three kids.

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He couldn't even give himself the medication. Sometimes kids had to give the medication. His wife just can't deal with it. She ends up cheating, having an affair. Next thing you know, she leaves, and then she takes the kids.

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So now he's lost his wife and his three kids. He then proceeds to then lose the house because he can't yeah, many issues. Then he's living in his car. Then from his car, he loses his car, gets repossessed. Then he loses the car, and he's homeless.

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I only ever found out about him because I was doing a seminar, a coaching program for Malaluca, which is I know Malaluca. It's like I use a lot of their products. There you go. Shout out to Malaleuca. They hired me to do a keynote speech to their entrepreneurs, their salespeople, and how to build their business.

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And he was in the room. What happened is a woman had met, or someone had met him and found him. I guess he was functionally, at least, speaking, and they wanted to help him, and they thought, okay, he's really struggling. Maybe I can bring him into this business opportunity and I can help him make money. Well, he told me later the only reason he could care less about the only reason he came, because he had a crush on a girl that he met at one of the meetings, and he wanted to come and see that girl.

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Oh, my God. I did my presentation at the very last five minutes of the presentation, after I shared with him about our success coaching program and all that, I said, we also give know I directed Produce Homeless in America. We rehabilitate veterans that have PTSD. And that was then that. He said he had not paid attention to a single thing I said for an hour and a half.

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But in the last five minutes, when I talked about we rehabilitate veterans with PTSD, their suicidal, their depression, anxiety and all that, he said he paid attention. And then we did a raffle where one person was going to win a ticket to come to the event. And apparently he told me, he told everybody up and down. There's 200 people in the room. He told everybody up and down on his row.

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I'm a veteran. I've got this problem, and I'm going to win that freaking ticket. I don't have money. I need this, I need this, I need this. And we did the raffle, the university.

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He wins the ticket, people. He comes to our program, which is Breakthrough Mastery. And we also have another program called Top. Producing faster to your wealth and freedom for entrepreneurs. He comes to our program.

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It's basically based on neuroscience, neurolinguistic programming, timeline therapy, hypnosis, healing. Healing and learning how to become the best version of herself and achieve your goals. He comes to our program, and it was a challenge because he had a lot of I won't get into the Gory stories, but in War, you're exposed to the very worst of humanity. That the graphic details of what he shared on stage. I could see the effect on everybody in the room.

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And we think we have problems. Yeah, no kidding. Because the images are so graphic. But we went through the process. He actually went through an NLP certification, timeline Therapy certification, where you heal yourself, you become the best version yourself, and you learn how to do that for other people.

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From there, he went and got a job. So he was in a good place. Got a job. From that job, he bought a car. He created some more opportunities.

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Got two cars, if I remember correctly, bought two cars. He had lost his house. He went back to the VA, did what he needed to do, got a house, and then he actually fought for custody of his kids. Would you believe he got full custody of his kids back. And it was roughly around this time, people told him, you'll never amount to anything.

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Before he done the breakthrough, he had a dream of getting a college degree. You'll never be able to succeed in life. You have such severe PTSD, you can't even sit through a 1 hour talk, let alone go through a four year university. You can't do that. That same man graduated magna cum laude with a year degree.

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Wow. And this is all after going through your program? Yes. And I forgot to mention one piece. This is after he had tried to commit suicide.

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Right. So before I met him, he shared with me, and he shared on stage in the seminar that he had tried to commit suicide three times. The third time that he tried, he literally put a rope to the ceiling, and the only.

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He tried to hang himself. Oh, my goodness. I can tell you that's tricking you up. Yeah, that's tough. That's so tough.

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The rope broke. Okay. Because he was overweight and it couldn't hold his weight. Wow.

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And he shared that he was upset and angry that he wasn't good enough to end his life. Yeah. And I've heard that from people, too, that when they are unsuccessful at committing suicide, that kind of messes them up in a way. Wow. I can't even do this right.

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Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Well, thank you so much for sharing all of that. The homeless has always been a topic near and dear to my heart because my brother was homeless for a very long time and it was all due to mental illness. And fortunately, where I live in Virginia, the county has a program and they were able to get him an apartment.

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And for the first few years, he had multiple people stopping by multiple times a week to check on him to make sure he was okay and got him on the correct medicine and just all of that. And he's fine today, but it was probably 30 years of in and out of being homeless. It's tough as a family member, too, when you can't do anything to help them, because a lot of times in that situation, they won't help themselves. Right. And it's that difficult, tough love that you have to give because they have to want to help themselves.

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And that was the situation that we went through that he didn't want any help. Yeah. And we couldn't do anything about. But but that's just incredible. Well, let's move on because we've got a lot to talk about, and I.

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Don'T want a lot to talk about. My listeners, I know they're used to shorter episodes. Just real quick, how on earth were you knighted by his royal highness prince Raphael of Spain as an honorary knight of merit of the royal order of Constantine the great? Like, where did that come from? Constantine The Great and St.

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Helen. Yes. St. Helen. Yeah.

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Where did this come from? My goodness. I got a call from John, a entrepreneur leader. He has a financial services company, so I had trained his company. So we've trained a lot of the real estate companies, the number one offices, the number one agents, century 21, williams, remax.

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We also train New York Life, WFG World Financial Group, patrick David's Company. PHP. So I've been doing a lot of work for a lot of time coaching companies on not only how to be successful, but also how to make a difference in the world, how to empower people. And I think just the body of work, whether it's the homeless in America that work with the veterans of PTSD, we also support Thorn. Ashton Kutcher.

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You talked about Ashton Kutcher. Ashton Kutcher. Demi Moore started an organization called Thorn for eradicating child trafficking, which, as you know, right now is a very big, hot topic with The Freedom, which is a great movie. So I've been doing a lot of philanthropy and success coaching for many years. And I just got a call one day by someone that was part of this organization, the Royal Order of Constantine the Great, and Saint Helen, his mother.

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And if you're wondering, Constantine, who's that? It's Emperor Constantine, the first emperor that actually brought Christianity into Rome. So it is a spiritual order and not necessarily where it includes everybody, anybody that is making a difference in the world. It's really about your contribution to the world. You could be of any different faith, non religious, religious.

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You could be of any faith. So I got the call, and next thing you know, a few months later, prince Raphael of Spain's flying out. Shout out to Prince Raphael and the great works that he's doing. And then also Duke Gerhardt and a few others, they flew out, and we had a nighting investiture, and there were a few of us that were selected. And it was an incredible experience.

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It was a very spiritual experience for me because I know we're all humans in the room, right? But whenever I get into a place like that, it, for me, was a very sacred experience. I think for some people, getting knighted is and I'm just mind reading, I could be wrong. I think for some people, getting knighted is about, this is what I've done. This is recognition of the work I've done.

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It was, and it is absolutely not that for me. For me, I'm still wiping because the tears that came and my nose is now running from my story shared earlier. And I don't even have any tissue right here, so whatever. It's okay.

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For me, it's a call to serve.

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It's like the Holy Spirit. It's like God coming in and saying, I want you to serve at an even higher level you to serve at an even higher level with a group of people that collaborating with a group of people that are moving in that same direction. And what we want to do is just help us. Their big cause I'm involved in many causes, but the big cause for the order is women and children that are starving, that are victims of domestic violence, trafficking and so forth. So they're really focused on building shelters that can help these people get back on their feet nice and grow.

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And it's right touch my heart, because I don't just care about these different causes and charities. The work. I do heals. Right. As we mentioned, neuroscience, neurolinks, to programming, timeline therapy, and hypnosis.

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We have a process where people heal their past and create their future by design, and then achieve their vision, whatever that vision is. Wow, that's incredible. All right. A course in miracles. We want to talk about that.

00:24:33
That was something. Miracles.

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I think we may have to do a whole nother episode just on that because there's so much to talk about. I was introduced to it years and years ago. I studied it on a weekly basis. We would have a group that would get together once a week, and I did that for about twelve years, and it just really made sense to me and I just loved it. And now you worked directly with Marion Williamson, because that's who I learned it from, just from her books.

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And I like the way she explains it. I used to listen to her books on tape. I think I told you when I was training for the Marine Corps Marathon, which I ran in 2006, I listened to her thank you. I listened to her when I would have a 1015 miles run, I would just pop on her book and just listen to it as I was running.

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For the listeners out there. Can you just do as brief a synopsis as you can on the Course in Miracle? Because I've never talked about it on my podcast just yet. So I love Neuro linguistic programming. We're doing some training.

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Right know, I'm involved in the mentor studio. Do you know Brigada regatta? Regatta with a b. She's at the actual she, she has the NLP training center at Georgia. Okay.

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From the person who started it or whatever. But anyway, she's doing some training for us, so I love that whole nother conversation on NLP. Let's get back to the course because it's just so much. It's just so much. Yeah, let's just briefly, I just want to give an intro to the course in Miracles for my listeners, just because on my podcast I try really hard not to talk about politics, religion.

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I think those are personal things. And again, Course in Miracles is just another spiritual practice, if you will. It's a spiritual writing that may make sense for some people, and it's not really contradictory to anything else. It's kind of like its own body of work, wouldn't you agree? Absolutely.

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And I would say that the Course of Miracles is called well, I just said that it's actually a it's a course of miracles because it states that it doesn't have a monopoly, it doesn't profess to be the course. It's basically saying that there are multiple paths to source Universe divinity. Right.

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I respect everybody's definition of it. And so it says that you go to the curriculum that resonates with you and draws you. And I had read the Bible one and a half times through back, many years back, and I was struggling. What brought me to the course, I believe is enormous amount of struggle and it has saved me from that. So before we get into the course, my journey to the so I was six years old, living in Algeria.

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And that's my earliest memories of know, a lot of gnarly things happening. My dad was a workaholic, he was always gone. My mom turned into an alcoholic for a period of time. And we were under the chaperone and under the care of certain people that my dad trusted. And these people were psychopaths.

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So a lot of the most darkest things that you don't want a kid to go through, I went through the physical abuse, the mental, the stuff, the emotional. And the other one is a topic that most people don't want to talk about. But now it's very big now with sounds of freedom and human trafficking and child trafficking and sex trafficking. So went through all abuse. So summarizing this.

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In my twenty s and thirty s, I survived the childhood. In my twenty s and thirty s, I'm lost and I don't know why. I have no purpose, no direction, no self worth, no self esteem. If you had asked me at that time, I wouldn't even know. I didn't know that I was lost.

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I didn't know that now looking back, I knew that I now know I was living in fear. And that's really what the course is about. Course is about transmuting that fear into love, forgiveness, and letting go and healing and realizing that you're the light. I'm the light. Well, my twenty s, thirty s, I'm blocked.

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I'm trying to start things, never doing anything. I have no money. I have a car that keeps breaking on the freeway. The radiator is leaking. I have no money to fix it.

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I'm driving the sucker for ten minutes. It overheats. I have to pull over on the freeway where car is going 70 miles an hour, wait for the radiator to cool down, pour water in it like I lived a dollar, week by week to my name, to my pocket. And it was a horrendous miserable experience. And then I finally went to my first seminar to fix me.

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Someone invited me, gave me a free ticket to join them. They had a pay ticket and I went to fix me. And I went through the process of learning the secret. I worked with first mentor was Chris Howard. I walked out of his seminar because he said, visualize your future.

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And all I saw was more shit because I was living in shit. And if you tell me to close my eyes and visualize my future, I'm just going to see more shit, right? Yeah, I walked out of that seminar. Then two years later, I saw the secret. And then that was the beginning of awakening and realizing I had negative thinking and positive thinking.

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And I started studying with Bob Proctor, Michael Beck, with Jack Capill. I ended up becoming one of their coaches. And even though I'm still stuck in so many ways, I actually became their number one coach for a period of time in their program called Science of Getting Rich. And then from there, studying the Bible. And still this thing is just nagging, this thing of insecurity and no self worth and no self esteem, while at the same time, oddly enough, I say this today because I feel that God is still using me to coach people and heal people, even though I'm still not fixed completely.

00:31:35
Which is interesting, because what the course of Miracle says very interesting. This is so interesting. Most people think, oh, the coach needs to be this perfect thing, this perfect person. The coach is the answer is the guru. Right?

00:31:51
Actually not what the course says. Let's call it a a course in Miracle says is, you are not the water. You are the faucet. God is the water. You are just the faucet.

00:32:08
That's right. And by the way, if you're watching this, I know I have clients now. They don't resonate with the word God. They resonate with the word the universe. They believe in the universe interchangeable.

00:32:20
Your higher self. Exactly. Your future self, God, whatever it is for you. Just realize the courses. Just realize it.

00:32:28
Talks about the authority problem. Just realize you are not the authority of yourself. You did not create yourself. If you can just accept that you did not create yourself. My mom and dad created me.

00:32:41
Well, no. Who created your mom and dad? There is a author of this universe. I think Marianne talks about it as, the universe is the handwriting of God. There is an author that created this.

00:32:56
And they say, today, we don't even have a clue. We don't even understand barely 1% of the universe. Right? That's right. Visible sky.

00:33:06
So it goes beyond even our comprehension. So this thing created us, and in this process of connecting to that, that's why she has a book, and she calls it Return to Love. A return to love. Yeah. I read the Bible and I felt like and ironically I will say this ironically, even though it wasn't the full answer for me at that time, ironically, if I look back at that one little patch of six months, where my relationships were better than they had ever had been.

00:33:43
It was actually while I was reading the Bible every single day for a year and a half. Okay?

00:33:50
I was still in holding on to something. And then one day, I had this pinching pain on my chest. I promise you, I'm getting it to the course of miracles. But it's just my context for this is so important because it's my breakthrough. I had this pinching feeling on my chest.

00:34:05
I'm already coaching these companies. I felt like I've made it. I made my money, and I'm, like, no longer driving a piece. Of crap car that's breaking on the freeway. I'm making a difference.

00:34:16
I probably feel like I'm it, right? Ego. Right? And I'm pinching pain on my chest, and I'm having a hard time breathing, and I'm like, well, what the heck is this? I go to the hospital.

00:34:32
They run a couple of tests, and they said, I'm sorry, sir, but we've just did an EKG. We've just done an ultrasound. You're saying it's here. We don't see anything. We've run a bunch of tests.

00:34:44
Your blood yeah, you could probably improve this, but we're going to send you to a psychologist, and we're going to write a prescription for you to go see a psychologist because we think you just have anxiety. I am madder than hell because you can't tell me this pinching pain is anxiety. When I'm anxiety, depression, coach, I help people get through there. I know what it's not that. And they said, I'm sorry, but we're going to send you home with a prescription.

00:35:16
We have one more test, but we already know that test is not going to reveal nothing. So you can start packing your stuff. And then right as I'm packing my stuff, someone comes in and says, just hold on a minute. We have some good news and some bad news. I'm like, well, what's that?

00:35:35
They said, the good news is you don't need to see psychologists or therapists. The bad news is you cannot leave the hospital. You need to have open heart surgery. What?

00:35:47
Oh, my gosh. No, I can't see. Oh, there. I can see it. Holy moly.

00:35:52
There's his scar. Oh, my gosh. And how old were you? I was 41. You need to have open heart surgery.

00:36:00
You have an ascending aortic aneurysm. And this is huge because this is a massive breakthrough for me, and I know it's leading to a massive breakthrough for someone that's watching this right now. You have an ascending aortic aneurysm, which is the swelling of the artery above the heart, which, if you think about it, my childhood from I haven't told you all the specifics of it. We don't need to get into it. But I had a broken heart.

00:36:30
Of course you did. Yeah. Very young age. Had a broken heart. I grew up not thinking I was not good enough.

00:36:37
Right. I knew I was not good enough. I knew I didn't matter. I knew I wasn't good enough. I had this broken heart.

00:36:48
And then I went to boarding school and abandoned there, so just a lot of stuff. And then I went through the surgery, and that was a very like, I cannot even explain to you. For people that have medical issues or health issues, I'm facing my life. I have my two sons, they're 715 and 16 who are looking at me as they're wheeling me into surgery, crying, thinking they're never going to see their dad alive again. Oh, my gosh.

00:37:21
I couldn't even be there for myself. I had to do timeline therapy on my own two sons so they would not worry, so I could go in surgery and do this thing. So, suffice to say, three, four months later, the doctor said after this surgery, it's extremely invasive, as you would imagine. They rip open your chest, they have to bone. It's like the Mayan thing, right?

00:37:50
That's what it is. And Dr. Cohen, who's, by the way, I'm writing a book called Resurrected. Resurrected, cool. Dr.

00:37:59
Robin Cohen, who did the surgery, has agreed to be in the book and a bunch of other people.

00:38:05
And he just told me back then, he said, when you have this surgery, I want to let you know we were talking about possible anxiety, depression, and you don't have that. You had this actual thing in your check, in your heart, but you will this time. You will go through anxiety, depression, because I know you're physically fit. You like to work out, you like to do all this stuff. Your life is never going to be the same again.

00:38:27
And blah, blah, blah, blah. I end up going through anxiety and depression. And then here enters the course of miracles. I'm crying every day. In fact, I don't even realize I'm crying every day.

00:38:38
I told my partner, Veronica, the doctors are wrong. I'm not going through anxiety, depression. I'm stronger than this. Strong, this guy. You need to just stop pretending you've been crying every single day, the last 90 days.

00:38:50
That's when I realized I was in a depression and I had this Roller, right? I have so much scar tissue and it's so stiff, right, that I'm supposed to stretch. And I had this roll and I'm doing the Roller, and I just said, I'm just done. I just can't do this anymore. I'm done with like how did I end up here?

00:39:16
How did I need something? Basically, I wound up watching a video with Oprah on Essence magazine. She's speaking to 4000 people and she's saying to the audience, look, you can be anything you want to be. You can do anything you want to do. You're just asking the wrong question.

00:39:39
What question am I asking? Oprah? My life is like I'm almost dying. Everything is just all I've been through. What question?

00:39:49
She says, you're asking for what you want. This is in alignment with the course. This is what brought me to the course. She's asking. She didn't say go to the course of miracles.

00:40:03
She never even mentioned it. She says, you're asking for what you want. You want the success. You want the house, you want the car, you want the beautiful spouse, you want the amazing kids. She says, you can have all that and more.

00:40:17
She says, but you're not asking the right question. She says, Ask not for what you want. She says, if you would just ask what your creator wants for you. What does your creator want for me? What does my creator.

00:40:36
So you say to your creator, Creator, what do you want for me? What do you want for me? Not what I want for me.

00:40:44
We go on an hour on this. I had a massive breakthrough. Didn't know it at the time, the different part of it, but the massive breakthrough is I realized I don't cuss. But I feel like when it gets to this moment, I want to cuss because it's so passionate. But I won't cuss.

00:41:02
But I realized I'm just screwed up. I'll just say that I realized I'm just screwed up because I've read the Bible. I kind of got on that train a little bit and then got off it. And I just realized I'm completely disconnected. I don't pray.

00:41:20
I don't this, I don't that. And then I realized I need a mentor. I'm friends with Mayor Paul Leone. By the way. Shout out to Mayor Paul.

00:41:29
He's a pastor. I thought of him. I thought of reading the Bible again, but I'm like, that's not going to work because I did it. And I still had all these problems. Probably just didn't do it for long enough.

00:41:41
I'll give it that as well. And then I thought of, this is. I love Joel Olstein. I thought it's motivational speaker. And then while I'm trying to find when I'm trying to find a lifeline, like, I feel like I'm drowning here.

00:42:00
I feel like I need a rope. This little silent little voice comes and whispers in my ear.

00:42:12
And I thought, okay, I have read that a little bit. I tried to, and I couldn't handle it at that. Yeah. Joined a group, maybe showed up for the first two, three meetings. And it's interesting.

00:42:27
Marianne Williamson says this all this time. Everybody has this very similar experience where the course of miracles comes in your life, and then for some reason, you put it on a shelf and you don't do it. And then it comes back to your life later, it returns. And it was in this moment that I said I'm messed up. I'm screwed up.

00:42:52
It's a different word I'm hearing in my head. But to be respectful, thank you, your audience. I'm just so screwed. Have I surrendered, Sandy? I just said I'm done.

00:43:05
I'm done. I'm so done. Even though I've had success, I've coached these companies. They all think I'm it, blah, blah, blah. I know inside, I'm in so much freaking pain.

00:43:15
I'm just so done living my life my way. What do I have to lose? What do I have to lose? I'm just going to shut up, and I'm just going to do what God asked me to do. Because me doing it my way, I'm just screwed.

00:43:31
I'm just screwed. Or I wouldn't even say I'm screwing things up. I would say a different way is today. I would realize that I was miserable. Right?

00:43:42
It's not that I didn't have results. It's that I had results. But I was still miserable. So I said, I'm going to give my life to God. Go to the course of miracles.

00:43:53
I'm going all the way with this. And if it doesn't work, I'm screwed anyway. So I already know doing it my way. I already know what it creates, right? So put on the earphones, because I don't like to flip pages.

00:44:05
I don't have the patience. I'm always moving. I put on the earphones, and in the first 30 minutes, I had a massive breakthrough course in miracles. Literally. Interestingly enough, I use the word nailed me.

00:44:23
It nailed me to the wall, which is interesting, because Christ got nailed on the cross, right? It nailed me because it just called me out. It called out my ego. It didn't say this because it doesn't say, I know you're a coach, and I know that you coach companies and you need to do this. It didn't say that, but it was speaking as if this is the message I got in the first 30 minutes.

00:44:47
You're a coach. You help people. Yeah, you think you know this stuff, that you teach them, but do you love them?

00:44:59
Do you love your brother and your sister in the world? And by the way, I actually have a biological brother and sister, but I'm not referring to that. It's referring to everybody in the world. Do you love them or are you fearful of them? Do you have a wall up?

00:45:18
Do you have a protection? And I'm starting to realize how I at that time, saw humans is my dad was Bill, and my dad did the best he could, but he was Mia mom, alcoholic, all these other people abused us. Myself, my sister. I had totally had no trust for mankind, and I was living fear of everything. And the course was basically saying, it's your ego.

00:45:51
And what's your ego, Kaya? Your ego is the wounded self. The wounded self that doesn't feel safe, that holds back from loving others, that keeps people at bay, that hides behind you're the coach, you're the he, or you're this, you're that. But meanwhile, you're so messed up. And if it says in the course of miracles, if you could only just give up the grandiosity of your ego, which, by the way, I had my nice suits, I had my nice tie, and I got the shiny tie, whatever, the silk ties, and I thought I was it because I've now made it.

00:46:31
And I'm coaching these companies, these big Fortune 500 companies, and it says, if you could just give up that bullshit. If you could just give up the grandiosity of your ego and I will tell you, son, speaking to me, you can step into the grandeur of God. And it was in that moment that I had my epiphany, and it was the door opened. Then you go in the door, then you need to uninstall, right? What are the courts of miracles?

00:47:08
Courts of Miracles makes it very clear you want to be enlightened. It says, how do you become enlightened? You think I think we all think we need to learn something new, learn something and become enlightened. It says no, it says you need to unlearn. You need to unlearn I need to unlearn all the distrust of humanity that nobody has my back, that I don't matter, that no one gives a crap about me.

00:47:39
I needed to unlearn all of that pain. I need to unlearn it and go so that I could learn the new thing. And what the course is basically teaching us is they're all children of God, children of source, children of the universe, children of whatever your higher power belief is, and to recognize that we are this little dot, this little pebble in this universe. But by the way, you've heard the notion that we come from stars, right? That stardust that spread all that matter around the entire universe, that created the planets, and then we come from that.

00:48:17
So we're basically stars. So stepping into how God sees me and stepping into and the course of America is so great on this. This is another massive breakthrough. Do you want to get to know me, Kaya? Do you want to get to know God?

00:48:35
Yeah. The way you will get to know God, the course of Mirko said, is by loving your brother and sister. Get to know your brother and sister. I'm like, Wait a minute. My brother and sister?

00:48:49
These are the people that let me down my whole entire life, not my biological brother, sister, meaning humanity. Humanity, humanity. Father that gave birth to me, who loved me supposedly more than anybody, even that let me down. So of course everybody is going to let you down, right? Yeah.

00:49:11
So it really ties into union psychology. So course in Miracles goes very nicely into we combine it with neurolinguistic programming and NLP and timeline therapy. Because union psychology, if most of your listeners might have heard of what you heard of psychology, and one of the two famous names is Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud. Carl Jung came up with the idea of perception is projection. Whatever's going on in your mind, the belief system, we literally have that as a filter.

00:49:46
We see the world through this filter, and based on how we see the world through this filter, that's what you see and that's what you attract. Like, in other words, if we sent you in a room and you believe that there's no money and there's scarcity, you're going to go in the room and that's what you're going to see. That's right. But if I sent Richard Branson let's just say if I sent Richard Branson in that same room as you, do you think Richard Branson would find opportunity and see opportunity in a room where nobody else saw it, which is interesting. Richard Branson where the airport, the weather was terrible, the airport got shut down, and everybody went into complete panic mode, frustrated they couldn't get to see their families on holidays.

00:50:34
What did Richard do? Early days, he went around and said, look, do you want to get home? Do you want to get home? Do you want to get home? Would you be willing to put in a $1,000?

00:50:43
Would you be pulling one in a $1,000? Would you be putting and he got a whole bunch of people that were willing to put in X amount, amount of money each. And he charted a private plane. Right. He was able to go into the miserable experience and see opportunity where no one else was seeing it.

00:51:03
So what it's teaching us is opportunity is there. Everywhere. Happiness is there. Your soulmate is there, literally waiting for you to wake up. And it might be your spouse who you're not even awake.

00:51:19
You're sleeping, and you're a misery, and you're the person you're married to is there in the house with you, and you have a complete dysfunctional relationship because you're with your so called soulmate, but you're asleep, right? It's wake up. The opportunity is there. Love's there. The happiness there.

00:51:36
It's right there in front of you. But we need to change our perception, right? So reverend Michael Beckwith in a secret with Bob Proctor and Jack Hamfeld. He says it so well. He says, you don't describe what you see so in your eyes, you don't look at the world and describe, well, this is the world I see.

00:51:55
He says it so profoundly. He says, you don't describe what you see. He says, you see what you describe. So you see what you describe meaning based on the description you're already having the story you're already having in your head. You're projecting that story.

00:52:11
And by the way, everybody has an ego. I still have an ego. We all do. Do you think ego likes to be right? When your ego has a story that men are this way, women are that way, salespeople are all this way, or this person's that way, or Middle Eastern people are like this, or Christian people are just like that, or cats are like this, or dogs like do you believe your ego wants to be wrong about your story, your perception?

00:52:43
That's right. The question is this is our perception reality and actuality? Is our perception, reality and actuality. So what the courses taught me is that and the breakthrough is realizing that we're all children of the universe, of God. If you want to build a relationship, that's why the course defines heaven as not a place or a condition.

00:53:17
The course defines heaven as a oneness with everything. When you're realizing I'm not better than you, that's another thing. Course talks about, I'm trying to be than you because deficiency. Now, for me to have, for me to win, I need to beat you. But no, when I don't compete with you, when I collaborate with you.

00:53:48
When I join forces with you, every idea, it's like I'm holding on to this idea. I don't want to tell you because you're going to steal it. When you take that idea and you share it, it grows in you. So the course is basically saying we have a complete upside down way of thinking and if I were to summarize this in 1 minute, it's creating misery, misery in your relationships, misery in your health, health issues, career issues. It's creating so much misery and are you willing to give up the misery and step into love?

00:54:28
Are you willing to get up fear and step into love? The moment when I decided I am no longer going to be fearful of my brother and sister, I'm going to look at not only my brother and sister in the world as my equal, I'm going to go one step further. I'm going to see my brother and sister as a child of God. Yes. Even when they don't see they're a child of God, even when they're going through their crap, I see the light course talks about Christ consciousness and so it's talking about Christ's vision.

00:55:06
It's basically saying your eyes are lying to you all the time. Yeah. Seeing what your eye sees based on a lot on what your ego sees, which basically is always saying I'm not safe and I'm separate and you're over there in that body and I'm over there in this body and we're both going after limited resources and one of us is going to die in the process.

00:55:34
Lack mentality too. The lack complete mentality. Yeah.

00:55:42
Matt, I just go on for days. It's been oh my gosh, I know, profound. And when I do this in a breakthrough, I have a 26 step breakthrough I do for people that are really ready to do the work of giving up the depression. And most people don't even admit that they have depression and anxiety and some people do. I know, and I did, I was there.

00:56:04
I almost felt like I got so bad after my surgery. I got so bad. There were days where I said, I now understand why people want to commit suicide and do commit suicide and I said, I'm not there just yet, but if this gets any yeah, I could see myself and giving that up and I really think your show, Sandy, happiness solved. I do really believe this is the elixir is the word. Yeah, it's the Holy Grail.

00:56:44
It's the what does God want for us? Source love, infinite universe in the course of miracles. It just wants you to be happy. That's right. It just wants you to bring happiness to others.

00:56:56
It wants you be the love. Be the light. Share the love. Share the light. And let's talk business for a second.

00:57:02
What does that look like? If you're a real estate agent, what does that look like? Financial service agent, what does that look like if you have a business and you have products and services to sell, of course the miracle says, your business is your mission, your commission to the world. You are offering these services as a metaphor for what you're really giving, which is love and light to people. That's right.

00:57:30
Your love and light. Maybe you're a painter. It's going to be a painting that makes people go, wow. Your love and light might be like LeBron James or Kobe or Jordan. It might be way you play the sport.

00:57:42
You might be educating people as a teacher. You might be empowering people as a coach. You might be a comedian. Actually one of the great things that what's his name? Jim Carrey said jim Carrey, he's got a lot of amazing quotes, but one of his quotes is that just for that 1 minute or just for that 1 hour when you come see my movie, I hope that I've given you an escape the minutiae and the stress and the worry and I get you to laugh.

00:58:18
I get you to laugh, chuckle, get to that inner child, have fun. So we're all, in our different ways, modes, methods and skill sets, we're all sharing that light with one another. Yes. And so your show is the elixir.

00:58:41
Thank you. It's the elixir. It's hands down. I think the single most important thing that according to course, that God wants for all of us is absolutely fear. Let go of misery.

00:58:57
Step into happiness. And it talks about sharing that. It says, when you share that happiness, that light that's in you, when you share that with others, it grows in you. An idea that is shared grows. You don't give the happiness to someone else.

00:59:18
And now, oh, the ego says, if I give someone else money, then I have less money. If I give someone else this resource, then I have less of this resource. Of course, in reality, opposite. It says only what you're giving the. Other person that's right.

00:59:33
Can you receive? And it also says, which is where I was for many years, only what you withhold from another person are you withholding from yourself. Right. And when we give to others, whether you're giving them money, food, a gift, whatever it is, even when you're paying for your groceries, if you express gratitude while you're doing that, it's going to come back to you. And I think, on that note, we're going to close this up.

01:00:04
We're just going to have to do this again, Kaya, because we're going to. Have to do this again. We just have so much to talk about. And I loved everything you said, which is why I just let you keep talking because I couldn't say it better myself. You're amazing.

01:00:19
Where can people find you and just shout out your website and where they can connect with you? All right, so first you can follow me on all my social media. Sir, Kaya Redford and then also, if you want to be invited into some of our events, we have free trainings, we have videos, we have a Facebook group, and then also maybe even a consultation. I would definitely love to support someone who would like to meet with me and chat, maybe. What about your goals and your vision?

01:00:52
So to do that, you would text the letters BM for breakthrough mastery, b breakthrough M mastery to 26786. Again, you just grab your phone and you text BM 26786, and again texting BM 26786. And then from there, you'll get some invites for some free events, some free coaching, and maybe even we can chat one on one one of these days. Oh, my gosh. Fantastic.

01:01:26
Well, to all my audience, thank you so much for listening today. Sir. Kaya redford. You're amazing. And we're definitely going to do this again because this is really awesome.

01:01:35
Thank you so much. Thank you so much, Sandy. Continue doing the great work you're doing in the world. Thank you.

01:01:48
I certainly hope that you enjoyed today's interview. Thank you so much for joining me. And as always, I hope that you and your family are healthy and safe and that your lives are filled with peace, joy, and happiness. Take care, everyone.

01:02:08
Bye.